Well update on my arts, I havent posted anything lately but ive been working on alot of poems and a few songs, I want to start perfecting wut I right b4 I post.

Ive hastely written a few poems on "last years events". Ive gone thru alot this past year and have found the most stressfull this is the unneeded involvment of a child who attended the same school as I.

I lost a close friend I considered a brother, have been more scared than ive have ever been, and have lost many nights of sleep. nothing of what happened has been easy and I have only ever been strong enough to give the details of the "event" to one person, court statment aside. And because of my fear, weakness and love for my lost brother, I couldnt do what everyone was telling me was right.
The proccess of serviving has been made all the more difficult by the involvment of this one little girl who had nothing to do with what happened. she doesnt want to accept that her oppinion of what happened and the oppinions of her friends are completely invaled.
The truth of the matter is, what he did was wrong. But I have accepted the fact that it was my fault that I put myself in a posistion for something to happen. and by writing privately and talking with the one person ive been comfortable with, Ive come along way (on most days).
The truth is, I've forgiven him. I dont believe there will be a time where I wont be afraid of him. But I choose to keep my favorite memories about Timmins good memories. Until recently I chose to pretend that he had died (tragic bus accident) but that still left a huge part of me feeling empty. although my missing piece wont come back fully I wont give back the joy I found in my home city.
sorry for my rant. I just needed to get some things out. Itd make more sence if I had written things out first.
but basically
Little girl posting my problems on internets bad
Moving on and forgivness good
fear but getting part it ok